"Mommy, could you please buy me these scissors? They're safe for me, and I broke the other pair." How can you say no to such a plea/argument in the sweetest tone from the kindest little 5 year-old? Not to mention the fact I rarely say no to her, but that's for the therapist. But the therapist may be needed because I am weak, and I caved, and the results are just another argument I should not be allowed to have kids.
She and her brother proceeded to sit for over an hour, drawing hearts and things humans cannot identify with all the red markers they could find. Ethan even thought it'd be fun to draw a few--all over his hands. Thank goodness Ally only wanted to cut out the ones drawn on paper, or 'ol Ethan would be a double amputee. She cut and she cut and she cut. With every single "masterpiece", she held it to me and said "Mommy, I made this for you because I love you so much." I was busy assembling yet another purchase (Sam went to the other room to ignore my purchase and hide from the kids), so I kept responding "That's great, honey!" without looking up.
I should learn to never encourage my children.
There were "valentines" and gifts ALL OVER MY HOUSE. God Almighty, the OCD kicked into over-drive. I picked them all up, and threw every last one away after she went to bed. But maybe I should have kept a few. Or at least one. Because a child can only sleep for so long.
She got up, looked around, looked in the trash can (yes, I know I should have taken the trash outside) and looked up, horrified. "Mommy, who threw all my valentines away?!" Crap. Damn. Shit. How do I get out of this one? My mind racing, and because I (1) was a debater in high school and HAVE to think fast, and (2) am absolutely diabolic, I raced through my options and responded in the only way that would get us through the day: "Your daddy."
I pray for Sam's survival when he gets home tonight.
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA
ReplyDeletePlease tell Ally that Addy and I would like to have Valentine's to hang in our rooms.